Pussy

Pussy

by Lucy Watkins

Pussy……boob……dick. What do these words mean to you? Besides being slang terms for primary and secondary sexual organs, they also carry with them negative connotations such as weakness, stupidity, and unpleasantness. Another frequently used term, “balls”, has a slightly different ring to it, suggesting audacity or guts. Isn’t it interesting how we used these terms? How accurate are their implications? Let’s begin by examining the definitions as listed in the American Heritage Dictionary:

Pussy: Noun….

3. Vulgar Slang a. The vulva. b. Sexual intercourse with a woman.

4. Offensive Slang used as a disparaging term for a woman

5. Slang A man regarded as weak, timid, or unmanly.

Boob: Noun….

Slang A stupid or foolish person; a dolt

Dick: Noun…

2. Vulgar A penis.

3. Vulgar A person, especially a man, regarded as mean or contemptible.

Verb

1. Vulgar To take advantage of; cheat.

2. To have sexual intercourse with.

Balls: Noun…

5. Vulgar Slang a. The testicles. b. Courage, especially when reckless. c. Great presumptuousness

Let’s face it. This type of language is just one of the symptoms of the influence of sexism on our culture. It illustrates the overwhelming sense that women are the weaker of the sexes. Sadly, this fallacy resonates deep within the psyche of our culture and penetrates the psyche of each and every human that lives beyond 3 years of age. As women, we know nothing could be further from the truth. Let’s really examine the absurdity of the applications of these slang terms.

First, there is the word “pussy.” As defined above, the slang term is used to describe someone who is weak, especially a male. Consider the facts. A pussy is a part of the body involved in pushing out a baby. This is the same pussy that is credited, by many, for having more control over men than they do of themselves. It is the hunted, the pursued. It is the ultimate prize. However, the overwhelming air of the term is negative and weak.

Secondly, there is the word “boob.” As defined above, this slang term is used to describe a fool. Consider the facts. A boob provides nourishment to newborns/toddlers/children. Okay. I won’t overlook the fact that this isn’t always the case. Certainly, there has been an increase in formula sales and many people have difficulty with breasts being used properly. Even so, breasts have a powerful affect on our culture. They are used to sell products, find lovers, and attract attention. People make money from other’s desire to have more attractive, more noticeable, perkier breasts. Entire retail chains are created with breasts in mind. Consumers spend high dollars to accessorize breasts. These secondary sex organs wield great power over the minds of both men and women.

Then, there is the word “dick.” As defined above, the slang term is used to describe a jerk or a contemptible person. How often do we use this term to describe a woman? “Dick” is usually used in terms of a man, often one with some sort of power over us or the situation in which we are involved. There is some sense of power in this term when used in reference to a male. A dick is a person who gets on our nerves, does something we don’t want him to do. Is the source of power in the word stemming from the erectile tissue within the penis? Does the fact that it hardens give it power? Let’s face it. All these babies do is push out a bunch of microscopic tadpoles who are most likely going to fall onto the sheets, slam into a thigh or butt cheek, be absorbed into the recipient’s system, or washed down the drain. It takes millions of them and their salmon-like movements to get to that egg. What’s so powerful about that? Then, there is the issue of this organ’s shyness. Have you ever seen a penis when its owner has had a bad day, been scolded, or embarrassed? It’s certainly not one of the owner’s proudest moments. Small and recessed, the dick’s dick shrinks when it’s cold or when confronted. Finally, there is the fact that, when in its normal state, a phallus doesn’t have much of a pain threshold.

Next comes the dick’s neighbors, the balls: aka “the boys”. The slang term “balls” refer to guts, fortitude, and daring. Again, balls are neither strong nor courageous. They dangle in the heat of the day and hide when cold or confronted. They are very tender and require a gentle touch unless one intends to inflict pain. How does such a strong word come from such highly sensitive parts?

With all this in mind, I’ve decided to incite a new arm of the feminist movement. We are going to battle sexism and ignorance with new uses of the proper terminology for women’s sexual organs, both primary and secondary. The following is a set of sample definitions and how to use them.

Clitoris – clit, happy button – one who makes another feel good; a person whose primary purpose is to compliment, be pleasant, and exciting.

Example: I went out with a gorgeous clitoris last night for dinner, conversation, and great time.

Labia (singular and plural)– protector, healthy, assertive, strong; allowing entry to only those who deserve it. Feel good guardian of the treasure.

Example: Those labia are wonderfully protective of their families. They really are inspirations to us all.

Vulva – group of women out for a good time; good friends seeking the pleasure of each other’s company; a united group with individual jobs, abilities, and interests who join together for the ultimate in success.

Example: I’m going to my vulva meeting tonight so I can work on my assignment and cheer on the other gals.

Nipple – source of great food, refreshment, comfort, and pleasure. One who is able to distinguish between business and pleasure.

Example: You are such a nipple! Thanks for dinner! I love spending time with you!

Ovary – strength, productivity, courageousness.

Example: That took major ovaries for her to stand up to that attorney today.

How inspiring this would be for our youth!! Can you imagine boys taking pride in being called “labia”? Maybe they would even go so far as to call each other “vagina” when they really want to compliment someone. How are the men of this society going to handle compliments like “My you have ovaries” or “You have finally earned you membership into this vulva”? I will relish the day my grandchildren call me “Granny Labia.” As you march forth and begin changing the face of our sexist language, just remember one thing. In order for this to happen, we’re going to need major ovaries for the labia of this world to get together and work as vulva to make this happen. We will most certainly need every clitoris out there!